I haven't seen the movie Cars yet because, when it first came out, I was told by a friend that its plot ran exactly like that of Doc Hollywood, and I later read more about it in a NY Times review, which, I must say with utter shame, fully persuaded me at the time to pass Cars by and consider keying it. But now I've been persuaded to rent that movie sometime, not only because the art looks incredible, but also because the similarities to Doc Hollywood appear unintentional. Also, Owen Wilson is top hat to me ever since I saw The Life Aquatic.
But one movie I will not see, and I can guarantee that with ardor: Eragon. And I won't be buying the book, either.
Sure, fantasy is fun, and the special effects are probably magnificent (special effects are boring now, because they're almost always "magnificent"), but I refuse to see it because I've already seen Star Wars a dozen times.
Apparently it's easy to write a hit novel or screenplay: take some young orphan with a crazy heritage unknown to him (adept at some mechanism of travel), add in an old mentor with an air of mystery, put in a dash of forces of darkness or evil empire led by some black-knight-or-wizard-looking guy, and finally kill the mentor in the end. Luke, Obi-Wan, the Galactic Empire, and Darth Vader killing Kenobi -- or is it Eragon? And if I've spoiled the end for you, I'm sorry, but I'm offended by encroaching globs of uncreative, commercial pabulum (there, I used your word, St. Crispin Bacon).
Also, why tire out the same old dragon motif even more? And by that, I mean why continue using the same stinking western-style dragons with little-to-no personality or complexity? And why have people ride them all the time? Dragons should be insane, demonic, treacherous and cool! And they should whip around like snakes and be just as frightening as they are beautiful by behaving like real animals, not posing all the time. The Dragonlance series, for instance, used tired dragon motifs, but included more aspects of dragons' personality, interesting magical properties of dragons, and emphasis on the absolute terror dragons cause in human beings. There has to be terror! And the spitting of nun-chucks!
But I'm being excessively negative today. Go see the movie if you so desire. It will probably include some type of huge, spherical fortress in the air that can only be destroyed by making the dragon spit fire at a certain spot, and that's sure to be exciting! And Eldest probably introduces a wise little green character, but I haven't looked into that.
May Samuel Morse be with you.
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